amazing in wonderful, strange, scary new ways

The last two months with C have been amazing. Amazing in wonderful, strange, scary new ways. Our first "date" after the downpour of rain was at Edgewater Park again. We sat on the large rocks right by the water, he brought a blanket and a backpack filled with wine, solo cups and snacks. We sat on the rocks listening to music on his iPod, sipping wine and talked until the sun had set.

We packed up and started walking up to the cliff that overlooks the city and he grabbed my hand and we walked hand in hand for a bit. By the time we got up to the cliff it had gotten super windy so we put down the blanket again, bundled up and laid down looking out over the city. We laid on that blanket and talked and laughed for hours. We were laying on our stomachs at one point and it happened. Our first kiss. Problem was, we were shoulder to shoulder and the angle was not working. So we laughed. A lot. And had a re-do. And the re-do was perfect. Beyond perfect. And we've been kissing ever since :)

  

A few days after this I went to Chicago with Kel for a few days away and some much needed best friend time. We had floor seat tickets to see Beyoncé at the United Center and it was hands down the most amazing concert I have ever been to. We spent the rest of our time in Chicago eating, shopping, walking around, drinking and talking about everything in our life. We've been together now for 15 years and there is literally not a soul that knows either of us better. At 25, our lives are both in vastly different places than what we could have imagined for ourselves and this trip gave us a break away to dish, sort and regroup.

 

 

When I got back from Chicago C was in Columbus visiting friends so I ended up going out with some girls to 25th. The next morning, before he even made it back to his place he stopped to see me. After such a short time, I thought about him way more than I should have during my time in Chicago and I could not wait to see him again. The connection between us is undeniable and every single day it blows my mind. When he stopped over we laid on my couch for an hour just talking and catching up and holding hands and cuddling. I could have laid their all day. But it was my nieces third birthday and my mom was in town so I had to head over for her breakfast brunch which was followed by a breakfast cookout later in the day.

 

This little girl has my heart in impossible ways. Being an Aunt is the absolute best.

 

 

After the cookout I had plans to stay with C, when I showed up he had his table lit up with candles, a bottle of wine chilling and wine glasses with fruit in them, a line up of snacks and appetizers and fresh fruit. He had music playing (and BTW his taste in music is SO perfect for me - so chill, with some good happy energy) and as always we talked for hours. We sat up on his rooftop for a bit and looked over the city and fell asleep to a movie. 

 

 

We went on our first official date night out and had so much fun. He planned everything from start to finish. An adorable Italian restaurant in Lakewood, checked out the new aLoft in the flats and then went to Lava Lounge in Tremont and made that our official spot. We danced, had too many drinks, took a cab home and made ridiculous conversation with the cabbie.

 

 

And since that night, we have been inseparable. When I said earlier that everything with C has been "amazing in wonderful, strange, scary new ways" it really has been a whirlwind of new experiences and feelings. He has made me feel things in the last two months that I did not experience in 9 years with Rick. I always just thought of myself as being highly independent, that I loved to do things on my own and never depend on a man for my own feelings of happiness, finances, fun, etc. when in reality, I was just with someone who didn't have any of that to offer to me. I want nothing more than to spend time with C, to experience life with him NOT outside of him which is how it was with Rick. He makes me feel cared for and protected in a way that I never have before. There is a comfort in being with him that only Kel has made me feel. I can't imagine that this is what it typically feels like when you are only dating someone and learning about them ... It feels so much greater than that. So I'm going with it. I have a lot of hurdles to get over from the past few months - trust, insecurities, fear of being hurt, but C makes all of that seem worth it.